I have come to the conclusion, I kind of let people walk on me these days
I am so concerned about a friend being offended that I am upset because they did something jerkish, that I just end up letting it go.
Then time and time again the jerkish thing happens, and I get upset, upset with myself, why do I let people treat me like that. Why do I just let things go, as much as it hurts me and annoys the piss out of me, I just act like it doesn't bother me, it builds and builds, time and time again being let down and I hang up the phone and I am almost in tears because of how hurtful this is, and how you don't even realize, because I was looking forward to that phone call, that email, that visit, that beach day, that lunch, that day at the park. I'm not a whiney brat, I don't complain often, and I would never let my friends down.
I am so hell bent on making sure other people are happy that I tend to let things ride. How would you feel if I built you up and then knocked you down all in the same day. Bottom line, if you say you are going to do something do it, a million excuses as to why you couldn't do it, or act like something more important came up so you had to bail, something more important being someone else that you would rather hang out with, or somewhere else you'd rather be.
Time to put on my green sweater, Thank god the day is over
1 comment:
Personally... I'm only interested by people who do what they say they're going to do... everybody gets the chance... but once that trust has been breeched once it's gone and I just don't bother any more... friends don't do that to friends... and it's not like it's so difficult to just say, "I'm not sure if I can," or "I'll try,"... but when people say they WILL do something and they don't do it I've got to see a sort of ignorance hard at work...
Anyways... hope these words find you well... and that your green sweater did the trick...
See ya later...
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